Sunday, June 29, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Freemasons
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Copy: Win a VIP Camp Bestival experience with
SingStar. Get 4 free tickets, a limo, stylish double
decker bus to sleep in, and a picnic hamper.
http://tinyurl.com/6hljdw
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“I'd stand for election to save Ireland from
the Freemasons" - Jim Corr
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POPBITCH _ _ _
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|_| |_| 26.06.08 ISSUE 403
Free every week: to subscribe/unsubscribe
go to http://www.popbitch.com
* A new "star" for OK!
* Say sorry to a Sally
* Charts: Ne-yo v Coldplay for number one spot
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>> Jacob the prisonbitch <<
Jeweller to find new client base
Hip-hop's most famous purveyor of bling,
Jacob the Jeweller, is off to prison for his
part in a rather cool sounding "interstate
drug ring". The man responsible for the
heinous crimes against accessories and
politically suspect obsession with wearing
diamonds by the rap and wannabe-black
(Justin Timberlake ect) pop community -
and the man behind Lil Kim's range of watches
is also the subject of rumours that he'd
started selling average pieces at outrageous
mark-ups. One famous rapper discovered his
fiancee's ring was worth less than 10% what
he paid for it and now others are getting their
pieces looked at to see if the sales were above
board.
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The Hawaiian creation myth suggests that the octopus
is the only survivor from a former alien universe.
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>> BB's best friend <<
Another ludicrous nobody for OK!
Richard Desmond still seems to be Big Brother's
number one fan. He still gives work to ex-
wannabes Chanelle and Nikki, to everyone else's
incomprehension. And this year OK! shelled out 80k
to buy up week one reject Stephanie. Even
though there doesn't seem to have been another bid.
More: BB Dale with his top off:
http://www.g-bar.com/gallery2006/?gdate=140706
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Britney Spears' sister Jamie Lynn has called her
baby Maddie. Which is just brilliant.
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>> Big Questions <<
What people are asking this week
Her reality show should ensure that she
never works again in her day job. So which
US actress's previous career was as a
high-class Hollywood hooker? And one of the
things that made her hate her ex-husband
was that he was happy to tell friends
about it.
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Prince Caspian star Ben Barnes used to be in
a Eurovisionp-wannabe boy band called Hi-Rise.
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>> Oops! <<
When sorry just isn't enough
JT writes:
"One of my mates was on a corporate golf day,
playing with three people he didn’t know. On the
first tee he hit a long low scuttling shot and cried
“Oops, that’s a Sally then!” One of the other
golfers said, What do you mean, a Sally? My mate
replied, "Well, you know, like that Sally
Gunnell. A good runner, but bloody ugly.
Cue Silence.........
"That’ll be Sally Gunnell, my wife", said
one of the others.
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The Discoo sale has 60% off EVERYTHING! It is your
final chance to grab some amazing fashion bargains!
http://www.discoo.co.uk
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>> Snack attack<<
What the food critics really eat
AA Gill, at Woodall Services on the M1 near
Sheffield bought three packets of crisps
including Walkers Sensations, Thai Sweet Chili
and a grab bag of Ready Salted.
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Like Dr Who, the octopus has three hearts.
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>> World's best job <<
Wanted: gate for gatekeeper
Decades ago Mutrah, Muscat's main city, was
separated from the port by a huge wall with a
large gate. Every sundown the gate would be closed
and sealed till the next morning. When the authorities
connected the roads and had to drive cars to the
port and back the gate wasn't large enough. So they
knocked two giant gaps either side of the gate and
built the road through.
Of course you don't point out to anyone your job
is useless, so for years the officer whose job
it was to be in charge of the gate still arrived
at sundown, making sure the gate was sealed, before
driving back out through the huge gap.
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Gareth Gates was on a Virgin flight from Las Vegas
to Gatwick this week. He sat in Economy (near the
back) and chatted to anyone who approached.
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>> Things that make you go hmm <<
David Gest, octopus, disco sheds!
Porn in Arab countries:
http://www.google.com/trends?q=arab+porn&ctab=0&geo=all&date=all&sort=0
Disco sheds! Needs sound on, and loud:
http://www.rainhamsheds.co.uk/
Octopus eats shark:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7004909622962894202
David Gest - pop star:
http://www.myspace.com/atticlights
Rape quiz - how would you score?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/pauliepaul/2607459023/
>> Chart Predictions <<
New entries/High climbers Sun 29th June
++ Number One
NE-YO Closer
++ Top Twenty
GLAS VEGAS Geraldine
COURTEENERS No You Didn't No You Don't
>> End Bit <<
Stuff about Popbitch
* Email stories, gossip:
hello@popbitch.com
* Subscribe or unsubscribe here:
http://www.popbitch.com
* Popbitch is published by Popdog Ltd.
* Web hosting by: http://del.co.uk
* Mail by aysabtu
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Thanks to: AM, SW, LB, JC, systemaddict 1, PS
missbhavin, JT, LW
*****************************************************
Old Jokes Home:
Q: What's the difference between a rock guitarist
and a jazz guitarist?
A: A rock guitarist gets to play three chords in
front of thousands of people.
Still Bored:
White tiger cubs:
http://itn.co.uk/videos/cbc786c5f8d5fca55fde2abb2d975504.html
Thursday, June 26, 2008
The Dark Knight - 1ST REVIEW !!
Heads up: a thunderbolt is about to rip into the blanket of bland we call summer movies. The Dark Knight, director Christopher Nolan's absolute stunner of a follow-up to 2005's Batman Begins, is a potent provocation decked out as a comic-book movie. Feverish action? Check. Dazzling spectacle? Check. Devilish fun? Check. But Nolan is just warming up. There's something raw and elemental at work in this artfully imagined universe. Striking out from his Batman origin story, Nolan cuts through to a deeper dimension. Huh? Wha? How can a conflicted guy in a bat suit and a villain with a cracked, painted-on clown smile speak to the essentials of the human condition? Just hang on for a shock to the system. The Dark Knight creates a place where good and evil — expected to do battle — decide instead to get it on and dance. "I don't want to kill you," Heath Ledger's psycho Joker tells Christian Bale's stalwart Batman. "You complete me." Don't buy the tease. He means it.
The trouble is that Batman, a.k.a. playboy Bruce Wayne, has had it up to here with being the white knight. He's pissed that the public sees him as a vigilante. He'll leave the hero stuff to district attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart) and stop the DA from moving in on Rachel Dawes (feisty Maggie Gyllenhaal, in for sweetie Katie Holmes), the lady love who is Batman's only hope for a normal life.
Everything gleams like sin in Gotham City (cinematographer Wally Pfister shot on location in Chicago, bringing a gritty reality to a cartoon fantasy). And the bad guys seem jazzed by their evildoing. Take the Joker, who treats a stunningly staged bank robbery like his private video game with accomplices in Joker masks, blood spurting and only one winner. Nolan shot this sequence, and three others, for the IMAX screen and with a finesse for choreographing action that rivals Michael Mann's Heat. But it's what's going on inside the Bathead that pulls us in. Bale is electrifying as a fallibly human crusader at war with his own conscience.
I can only speak superlatives of Ledger, who is mad-crazy-blazing brilliant as the Joker. Miles from Jack Nicholson's broadly funny take on the role in Tim Burton's 1989 Batman, Ledger takes the role to the shadows, where even what's comic is hardly a relief. No plastic mask for Ledger; his face is caked with moldy makeup that highlights the red scar of a grin, the grungy hair and the yellowing teeth of a hound fresh out of hell. To the clown prince of crime, a knife is preferable to a gun, the better to "savor the moment."
The deft script, by Nolan and his brother Jonathan, taking note of Bob Kane's original Batman and Frank Miller's bleak rethink, refuses to explain the Joker with pop psychology. Forget Freudian hints about a dad who carved a smile into his son's face with a razor. As the Joker says, "What doesn't kill you makes you stranger."
The Joker represents the last completed role for Ledger, who died in January at 28 before finishing work on Terry Gilliam's The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. It's typical of Ledger's total commitment to films as diverse as Brokeback Mountain and I'm Not There that he does nothing out of vanity or the need to be liked. If there's a movement to get him the first posthumous Oscar since Peter Finch won for 1976's Network, sign me up. Ledger's Joker has no gray areas — he's all rampaging id. Watch him crash a party and circle Rachel, a woman torn between Bale's Bruce (she knows he's Batman) and Eckhart's DA, another lover she has to share with his civic duty. "Hello, beautiful," says the Joker, sniffing Rachel like a feral beast. He's right when he compares himself to a dog chasing a car: The chase is all. The Joker's sadism is limitless, and the masochistic delight he takes in being punched and bloodied to a pulp would shame the Marquis de Sade. "I choose chaos," says the Joker, and those words sum up what's at stake in The Dark Knight.
The Joker wants Batman to choose chaos as well. He knows humanity is what you lose while you're busy making plans to gain power. Every actor brings his A game to show the lure of the dark side. Michael Caine purrs with sarcastic wit as Bruce's butler, Alfred, who harbors a secret that could crush his boss's spirit. Morgan Freeman radiates tough wisdom as Lucius Fox, the scientist who designs those wonderful toys — wait till you get a load of the Batpod — but who finds his own standards being compromised. Gary Oldman is so skilled that he makes virtue exciting as Jim Gordon, the ultimate good cop and as such a prime target for the Joker. As Harvey tells the Caped Crusader, "You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become a villain." Eckhart earns major props for scarily and movingly portraying the DA's transformation into the dreaded Harvey Two-Face, an event sparked by the brutal murder of a major character.
No fair giving away the mysteries of The Dark Knight. It's enough to marvel at the way Nolan — a world-class filmmaker, be it Memento, Insomnia or The Prestige — brings pop escapism whisper-close to enduring art. It's enough to watch Bale chillingly render Batman as a lost warrior, evoking Al Pacino in The Godfather II in his delusion and desolation. It's enough to see Ledger conjure up the anarchy of the Sex Pistols and A Clockwork Orange as he creates a Joker for the ages. Go ahead, bitch about the movie being too long, at two and a half hours, for short attention spans (it is), too somber for the Hulk crowd (it is), too smart for its own good (it isn't). The haunting and visionary Dark Knight soars on the wings of untamed imagination. It's full of surprises you don't see coming. And just try to get it out of your dreams.
This is from Rolling Stone magazine
Online Fake Shemp
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Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
SFX
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