Sunday, July 29, 2007

Big Issue ?

Above are scans from The Big Issue Simpsons piece. Enjoy.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory

Avoid the remake. This film is fantastic. A Cult favourite.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - The Parole Officer

It's okay, a nice little caper. Reminded me of an Ealing comedy. Nowhere as good though.


Wasn't very good to be honest. Bit lame.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - The Simpsons Movie

Sorry it's late, I watched it on Wednesday and been busy ever since.

AWESOME. I thought was fantastic. I was gutted when it ended. I wanted more !


Great stuff. Great camera angles and very colourful. Which is best ? This or Brazil !?


Got tickets to see Goldfinger in the cinema on Tuesday night. Looking forward to it.


Boring. Nothing happens for ages.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007


Pretty good, if a little slow. Jenny is good playing against her type.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Undercover Brother


Tomorrow !

I cannot wait ! Leave me reviews in the comments box when you've watched it.


Raindance presents:
David S Freeman's
LA's and New York's most popular screenwriting class returns to London

9:30 - 7:45pm Saturday/Sunday
23/24 September 2007
David Freeman's Beyond Structure
American Beauty
Parrallel Plotlines
Day 1 Course Outline
Day 2 Cours Outline
Featured Article
David Freeman
David Freeman's Beyond Structure has attained its enormous popularity because of his radical approach. Tired of theory? You won't get any here. Instead, David teaches 200 powerful screenwriting techniques you won't find anywhere else, and which you can use immediately to enhance the artistry of your scripts. (They work for novelists too!)

Here's just one of the 200 PLOT DEEPENING TECHNIQUES you'll learn in Beyond Structure illustrated by American Beauty. This technique adds a feeling of emotional depth to plots. This technique is Parallel Plotlines:

Find Out More

What They Are Saying
"David Freeman has broken down the craft and art of screenwriting into its building blocks -- a periodic table of highly effective techniques that the masters have been using and which now anyone can learn. He can even take a difficult subject like how to add emotional layers and depth to a scene or script and show exactly how it's done. I don't think this information is available anywhere else."

Gary Goldman

Executive Producer and uncredited Co-Writer: MINORITY REPORT; Co-writer: TOTAL RECALL; currently writing THE END OF ETERNITY for Columbia Pictures and director Ridley Scott.

"David Freeman's strategy is excellent: If you want to write like the masters of film and television, use their techniques. You can spend ten years of your life studying, compiling, and inventing those techniques, like David did -- or you could attend his weekend "BEYOND STRUCTURE" Workshop. I've tried both, but I recommend the latter."

Joe Reinkemeyer

To reserve your place
Call Raindance
+44 (0) 207 287 3833

What They Are Saying
"Using something akin to the Vulcan mind meld, David has probed into the minds of Hollywood's master writers and identified all of their techniques. But the even greater feat is how David manages to articulate thee techniques better than the masters themselves. This seminar is a must."

Evan Somers

Former staff writer: STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE; writer of episodes: STAR TREK: VOYAGER
"When I took David's class, I had just finished a first pass at a very challenging feature adaptation I had been hired to write. In David's workshop. I found powerful techniques, clearly presented, that I could immediately use to make my characters' emotional arcs more defined and which allowed the script to operate on more profound levels. These techniques are just as applicable to my television writing. David's techniques for increasing a writer's artistry are fresh, exciting, and immensely practical."

Jan Oxenburg

Writer: COLD CASE, ROBBERY HOMICIDE DIVISION, Supervising Producer: THE EDUCATION OF MAX BICKFORD; Producer: ONCE AND AGAIN; Former Coproducer: CHICAGO HOPE; Recently finished writing a feature for Robert Greenwald Productions based on James Ellroy's memoir: MY DARK PLACES; Theatrical Feature: THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT; Former Executive Story Editor: NOTHING SACRED; Former Story Editor: RELATIVITY.
"Although I took David Freeman's class with the intention of expanding my skills for feature film writing, I found the Story Brainstorming Techniques and the Dialogue Techniques highly applicable to the half-hour comedy writing that I do everyday. Part of my work involves creating and writing pilots, and in this regard I especially liked his "Character Diamond" Technique. It is simple to use and creates strong, identifiable characters., and I will be using it for all my pilot development from now on."

Ellen Sandler

Credits include: Co-executive Producer/Writer: EVERYONE LOVES RAYMOND; Producer/Writer: COACH; Creator/Co-Executive Producer: CASS (pilot starring Kathy Baker); Creator/Executive Producer: KATEY (CBS pilot starring Katey Sagal)
"The exciting tools David offers have vast application for any director. His many specific techniques, from adding depth to a scene to ways of making characters more layered and dimen-sional, translate straight into the art of directing. Directors are in for a big creative boost when they take David's class."

William Dear

"What David does is unique, lucid and generous. He shows you how to sculpt, deepen, and enliven a script, and even how to have fun in writing it. He has conceptualized writing systems and tools that will empower both the veteran and novice to achieve deeper depths and higher heights in their writing. He is funny and charismatic; he's also a successful working writer. I will be using the tools he has passed on for years. "


Emmy-award winning director: THE WONDER YEARS. Co-writer, co- producer, DREAM WITH THE FISHES (Sony Classics). Executive Producer, MOON (Paramount).

Raindance is pleased to present David Freeman's Beyond Structure in London this September 23rd and 24th.

Beyond Structure is the single most popular screenwriting workshop in Los Angeles and New York. It's been taken by the writers, directors, producers, stars, and key creative executives behind: Good Will Hunting, the Austin Powers films, E.R., Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The X-Files, The Wedding Singer, Total Recall, 12 Monkeys, Meet the Fockers, and many more.

And we have a special offer until August 7th: Both the weekend class, save 20% AND benefit from 2 FREE evening classes.

Read on.
american beauty
Parrallel Plotlines in American Beauty

Wes Bentley plays Ricky Fits, the young man with the video camera. His life is paralleled by Lester Burnham (Kevin Spacey):

1. Ricky begins the movie in apathy (because, we'll learn, he was put in a mental institution and drugged). When we first meet Lester, he's in apathy as well, mechanically performing his humiliating job from his little office cubicle.
3. Ricky smokes dope. Lester smokes dope.
4. Ricky quits his job. Lester quits his job.
5. Ricky is in love with a teenage girl. Lester is in love (or lust anyway) with a teenage girl.
6. Ricky is a teen. Lester acts like a teen - buying the hotrod of his teenage dreams, taking a job at a fast food restaurant, and declaring that he hates responsibility (i.e. being an adult).
7. Ricky possesses some profound spiritual insights, exemplified in his speech about seeing life and its beauty in and through all things. It's a realization he had when witnessing a plastic bag dancing in the wind. Lester repeats this exact same speech at the end of the film.
8. Both Ricky and Lester overcome their apathy. Ricky rises up from apathy to anger (and finally leaves his father). Lester rises all the way up to true spiritual serenity (which takes place right before he dies, and continues to expand afterward.)

Parallel Plotlines is only one of over 50 ways to give emotional depth to a plot. By the way, it's worth noting that Ricky, when he gives his "beauty" speech (about the plastic bag), has not attained true spiritual serenity at that point, although he (and at first, we) believe he has. His Zen-like serenity if fake, covering his apathy. After all, Zen masters don't sell drugs, they don't allow themselves to be beaten to a pulp by their fathers, they don't insist on staying detached from the world (viewing everything though a camera), and they don't get fascinated by death and speak about it frequently.

Having a false emotion (here, serenity) covering a real emotion (in this case, apathy), gives depth to a character. It's what David calls a Character Deepening Technique. In Beyond Structure, you'll learn dozens of others to enrich your characters.

Imagine two days jam-packed with techniques like the above, and not just for adding depth and uniqueness to characters and plots, but to scenes and dialogue as well. Stir in lots of film clips, add some some chances to master the techniques by practising them in class, and then season the mix with David's warmth and humour, and you've got the magic which is Beyond Structure.

If you find it useful to learn techniques like the above, you might enjoy poking around David's home website - and reading the many illuminating articles there. They're packed with valuable techniques.

David only comes to teach in London once a year. Don't miss this rare opportunity to vastly enhance your artistic palette and inspiration as you learn from the best of the best. Your writing will never be the same.

Read an article on THEME IN PAN'S LABYRINTH
Day 1 Course Outline

Saturday Sept 23 9:30am - 7:45pm
100 Techniques For Making Characters and Dialogue Stand Out

Learn and practice techniques to:

Create Riveting, 3-Dimensional Characters
- 10 techniques for crafting unique, psychologically complex characters.
- 38 kinds of character growth for heroes.
- 36 ways to make leading characters likable without making them bland.
- How to create characters who aren't limited to real people you've met.
- 25 types of character quirks and eccentricities.
- 37 techniques for giving characters depth.
- 11 ways to show character development in stages.
- Techniques to create interesting villains.

Write Luminous Dialogue
- How to give each character a distinctive voice.
- 5 ways to express a character's dimensionality in dialogue.
- 14 techniques to capture the rhythm and sound of conversation.
- 4 ways to inject depth or subtext into dialogue.
- Advanced Dialogue Techniques.
- The ultimate dialogue challenge.
- 6 techniques for revealing ambivalence in dialogue.
Day 2 Course Outline

Sunday Sept 24 9:30am - 6pm
100 Techniques For Creating Compelling Plots and Scenes And How to Write or Develop What Sells.

Learn and practice techniques to:

Invent Great Premises
- 8 techniques for generating fresh story ideas.
- 11 ways of modifying ideas to develop radically alternative story-lines.

Develop These Premises Into Imaginative Plots
- 70 types of plot twists.
- 35 possible objectives for your hero.

Using plot to shape characters emotional growth,
- 5 additional ways to relate character growth to the plot.

Learn the most efficient way to brainstorm a story from beginning to end.
- Create Memorable Scenes

Scene Sculpting
- Ways to make scenes interesting and emotionally layered.

The Marketplace Guidelines for Hollywood vs. independent films.

Learn to use the brainstorming computer to improve your pitches.
Ultimate Pitching Skills Workshop


On the evening of Thursday, Septemder 21st from 6:30 - 9pm, David Freeman is hosting a pitching skills workshop at Raindance. In it he will demonstrate, using students' pitches, how to rearrange the story and pitch it in order to close a deal. It's only £9.99 and is not advertised anywhere else.

To book, you need to call Raindance on 0207 287 3833.

This class is FREE to members of Raindance, and to anyone attending the weekend Beyond Structure.
Writing Unforgettable Characters and Scenes

Tuesday September 18, 7pm - 9pm

Central London

£10 (free to Raindance members or if you book Dave's Beyond Structure masterclass)

Yet another free evening class if you book onto the Beyond Structure masterclass. Attend this intensive, high-impact class for a dozen specific techniques to markedly improve your characters and scenes.

Filmmaking needn't be expensive, or cluttered with mystique. Let David Freeman give you the information you need to launch your career.

Happy Filmmaking,

Will Pearce
Raindance Festivals Limited

phone: +44 (0) 207 287 3833

- Ask about our special repeater fee (-50%) if you have taken this course before and would like a refresher
- Ask about our Group Booking discount for 3+ students
- Members of Raindance get a 15% discount.
- Students, OAP's and UB40's 10% discount

Discounts cannot be combined.
We know Raindance Courses Work
Guy Ritchie, Kirk Jones, Christopher Nolan, Jake West, Jeremy Bolt, Paul Brooks, Vadim Jean, Richard Holmes, Roland Gift, and Emily Lloyd are some of the people who have taken a Raindance course.
Offer Expires: Enter Expiration Date here
The Raindance Guarantee

Try any course at Raindance and discover that the course isn't for you, just make yourself known to a member of Raindance for a no-questions asked refund.
The Fine Print: The fine print:
Refund requests only accepted until the first break on a weeknight course, and lunch-time on a weekend course.
About David Freeman
Working as a writer and producer, David Freeman has written and developed scripts and other properties which have been bought or optioned by Columbia Pictures, MGM, Paramount, Castle Rock, Buena Vista Television, Atlas Entertainment, Hearst Entertainment, and many other major film and television production companies. He's a long-standing member of the Writers Guild of America.

The workshop has been taken by Writers, Directors, Producers, Stars, and Key Creative Executives behind: Minority Report, Good Will Hunting, The Fugitive, E.R., Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The Simpsons, The X-Files, Total Recall, Face/Off, 12 Monkeys, King of the Hill

Early Bird Discount: Book this class before August 7th and save 20%

Offer Expires: 7 August 2007
Call 0207 287 3833 to book

Monday, July 23, 2007


Really wanted to love this film. Felt a bit empty and was a bit slow too. It's good though.

Lottie B and LocateTV

Lottie B is my new friend. So, who is Lottie B ?
Well Lottie B is one of the lovely people who have set LocateTV.
At moment it's being trialled, so there isn't much to me as yet.
We all hope it to be the Google of TV and film. It's a nice and simple, slick site that lets you
search for when programmes/films are showing on TV, online and DVD.
It will be constantly updated and region specific, with a host of other features in the pipeline
that'll let you customise it without losing its essential clarity.
Keep yourself updated at their lovely blog.

This all sounds fantastic and I cannot wait. Ill you more news when I get my hands on it.


I think this might be Michael Bay's best film. Great effects. I love Optimus Prime.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

The Simpsons Movie Special on Sky One

It'll be on again pretty soon. It's okay. It shows new clips from the film, and interviews from the folks involved.


Right, I was at a mates' house and they were watching a hooky copy of this film.
The film is pretty funny. Very smart comedy. I'll see it again on the big screen.


More of the same gags and setups. It's just not as good. Shame really.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Short Circuit 2

Not as good as the first one, but that wasn't that great. The scene where Johnny 5 gets battered can scare little kids, believe me.


Crazy, insane fun from Burton. Awesome ensemble cast. Relentless Martians !


I love this film. Stupid, stupid fun. We need more comedies like this. Ones that make me laugh.


Hitchcock's classic. A simple, good ol' murder mystery. Grace Kelly is stunning.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

This Wednesday

Yes ! I have my tickets for The Simpsons Movie for this Wednesday. To celebrate, I have stuck these images I have been sent. They are from this month's Unlimited Magazine from Cineworld.

Friday, July 20, 2007

Thursday, July 19, 2007

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - The Thomas Crown Affair (1999)

Rene Russo is very attractive. Is this as good as the original ...?


Still visually stunning. Lush slow cameras. Better than Clockwork Orange.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix - GUEST REVIEW

This is special. We have a evelovesporkchops fan. Her name is Lottie B. I will explain who she is a little later. She's sent me her IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW for Harry's latest caper -

The darkest yet. Again. Is the last film going to be so dark we won't actually be able to
see any of the by-then-20 year old cast ?

Thank you Lottie. I love you. And yes, after the weekend (hopefully) I will watch and review
"The Beat That My Heart Skipped". Just for you.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - The Hand That Rocks The Cradle

Curtis Hanson is a genius. This film is very underrated. This, and Polanski's Frantic are the closest we have to Hitchcock.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007


Monday, July 16, 2007

26th July over here actually ...

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Really good. Not as great as the previous film mind ...

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Bulletproof Monk

What was this film about ? I wasn't really watching it. Couldn't have been that good then.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Dirty Rotten Scoundrels

I enjoyed this. The first time I saw this, I did not expect the ending.

Saturday, July 14, 2007


Good fun. Effects still looks pretty good, as does Ms. Dunst.


Rubbish. If I had to choose, Turner & Hooch wins every time.

Facebook film ick

I have set up a film ick profile on Facebook. Be our friend. And give us hints and tips on how to best use Facebook for film ick business.

Friday, July 13, 2007


Hitchcockian film by Polanski. Works really well. Great film. Go rent.

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - Deuce Bigalow ; Male Gigolo

Brash comedy. It's not the world's greatest film ever made.

Thursday, July 12, 2007


Not sure if this photo is from the film. The film was okay.

Latest PopBitch

Britain's Next Top Model is warming up nicely on
LIVING tv. Just two episodes in and we've had
bitchfights, accidents and tears over new hairdos.
Catch the show on LIVING, Mondays, 9pm. For info:

"I don't like bricks. I prefer stones" - Judy Finnigan
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* Carl Cox shows us how it's done
* Live Earth fun and games
* Charts: Rihanna is STILL number one

>> Stone the crows <<
Celebrity climate change confusion

Joss Stone performed at Live Earth Johannesburg.
While she stopped to do some interviews for about
20 minutes, someone in her entourage instructed
her driver (a Mercedes bio diesel limo) to
keep the engine running so the car interior
stayed warm for the star.

FYI Johannesburg headliners UB40 announced a track
with, "Nice to see you all singing, we've got an
album out at the moment, this is a track from it."
(So not just for the polar bears, then.)

London's hottest playgroup is in Battersea.
Mark Owen regularly attends, with child, and
happily accompanies the kids on a tambourine.

>> No Chandon, no band on <<
Carl Cox's bubbly lifestyle

Pop stars largely kept their usual
high-maintenance demands away from Live Earth.
Which reminds us of our favourite ever
pop star rider:

DJ Carl Cox ALWAYS got at least a magnum of
good quality champagne - wherever he played.

As his tour manager was fond of saying:

"No Moet, no show-ey
No Chandon, No band on."

Live Earth's BBC1 audience peaked at 3.1m. This
year's Eurovision got 10.9m.

>> Big Questions <<
What people want to know this week

He may be a bit of a wizard on the green baize
but which snooker star lost his passport this
week in Hong Kong's bar district... on a
night out with a hooker?

Which Brit rap lothario keeps a shagpad in
Wimbledon secret from both wife and girlfriend?
When he's not ensconced his married friends
can enjoy its charms.

Slang for gay in China is "to be fond of the
leftover peach" or a "sleeve-cutter".

>> Not the new Banksy <<
Jack Penate makes new fans

wee minger writes:
"XL artist Jack Penate was rather cocky when
confronting management at Glasgow's Sub Club
last Sunday, after liberally applying his 'tag'
to many flat surfaces in the club. However,
he was lot less cocky afterwards, when he had
to stump up a couple of hundred quid and
grovel to the club for his bag, which he had
inadvertently left behind."

O2 customers can buy tickets before anyone else for
the White Stripes concert at The O2 in November.
Offer ends tonight!

>> Radio gone gaga <<
Does anyone in music know arse from elbow?

Radio One's head of music has been telling
record label A&Rs to consult him before
signing any bands... because what would be
the point without knowing if you were going
to get any airplay on One.

And they say the music industry is
in crisis...

Bono and The Edge are doing research for their
upcoming Spiderman: The Musical by going to Broadway
shows such as Xanadu and Spring Awakening.

>> Deerly beloved <<
How to be really sneaky

Deer farmers breed their does with an Alpha
male deer to get the best possible breeding
results. But to sure all the does get
pregnant they also let a young male deer
hang around, to catch any the top deer misses.
The technical term for this role, even in the
deer management text books? "The sneaky fucker".

Journey's brilliant Don't Stop Believing has hit
number one in Ireland, thanks to an appearance
on the final episode of The Sopranos.

>> Food for thought <<
Don't touch John McClane's dinner

Bruce Willis' regular chat-up line is
"You smell nice! I'm Bruce Willis. Do you
want to go to dinner with me?"

However, dinner can be a fraught time for
Bruce. He has a morbid fear of anyone
touching his food.

Poor Oliver Stone recently dumped a girlfriend
when he caught her sniggering with her friends
about his hair plugs.

>> Man in black <<
Graham Poll reinvented

Controversial referee Graham Poll is making
a nice living as an after-dinner speaker.
He introduces himself by saying "Good evening.
I'm the complete tosser who gave out three
yellow cards in the World Cup."

It's easy to be scornful of Poll, but he did
only made 60 grand a year for taking that
abuse - about the same as Andrei Shevchenko
gets every three days. And he's confessed the
real reason he decided to quit early was when
his thirteen year-old daughter started
getting death threats.

Nick Cave spotted running for a bus on the Kings Rd.
He "runs like a girl".

>> Pandering to your affection <<
Animal videos to soothe your Thursday

Pandas rule. They may be next year's otters.
Here they cry, sneeze and fight:

1. Panda Cry

2. Panda Sneeze

3. Panda Fight!

Justin Timberlake had 7000 bottles of Fiji
Water delivered to O2 for his gigs.

>> Things that make you go hmmm <<
Daniel Radcliffe, Japan, marmots

New weird Japanese eating trend:

Sex toys for supermodels. And royal girlfriends.
Moss likes the gold one, Middleton the cone:

Adulterous marmots rule!

Daniel Radcliffe and Freddie Mercury
share stylist:

Ukraine's Eurovision tranny gets a big release
in Germany:

Someone doesn't like Mr Amy Winehouse:

Carbon offsetting - just guilt-removal
for rich people?

>> Chart Predictions <<
New entries/High climbers Sun 15th July

++ Number One
RIHANNA Umbrella

++ Top Ten
ARCTIC MONKEYS Fluorescent Adolescence

++ Top Twenty
BLOC PARTY Hunting For Witches
ARCTIC MONKEYS Fluorescent Adolescent
TRAVIS Selfish Jean

++ Top Forty
DYKEENIES Clean Up Your Eyes

>> End Bit <<
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Old Jokes Home:
An amnesiac walked into a bar.
He said, "Do I come here often?"

Still Bored?
Buy Julie Goodyear's car:


Clever film. Really enjoyed watching this whenever it's on TV.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007


Still the best out of all the Batman films. Very dark. Tim Burton did well.

Monday, July 09, 2007

IN DEPTH FILM REVIEW - My Best Friend's Wedding

Utter utter rubbish. Crap. Julia Roberts looks good though.


Awesome, brutal, fantastic, amazing. I say - GO WATCH THIS FILM.


Dunst is lush in this film. Lazy Shakespeare re-hash. Watchable though.


Clunky editing. Pretty lame film all in all. I would avoid this at most costs.